Open chest (and there she is)

I know this doesn’t look like much of a war chant, but brace yourselves, because it’s exactly what it is.

There comes a time in a spiritually aware person’s life when they have to ask themselves some heavy questions, contemplate on their journey and start thinking about their worth. And what better time than right now?

In times like these, when people still believe that masks and distances, vaccines and fences are the details that make all the difference and the things that keep them safe and protected, when the vast majority of individuals just want things to go back to the way they were, where people fear change more than death, do you love yourself enough to give up everything and get out of the Matrix, for good? Do you love yourself enough to permanently close the doors to every place where they made you feel less than you were? Do you love yourself enough to completely remove yourself from society and have your identity erased, like you never existed? Do you love yourself enough to believe that you are more than enough – not too much, not too little? Do you love yourself enough to be prepared to never see your family and loved ones again, should it come to this? Do you love yourself enough to freeze or starve to death in the cold somewhere, rather than give them another chance to lure you in and make you their bitch once more? Do you love yourself enough to stay true to yourself, whatever the consequences? Do you love yourself enough to learn how to survive in the woods, should you have to? Do you love yourself enough to choose you first? Do you love yourself enough to sacrifice everything you have for a single breath of fresh air that smells like freedom? Do you love yourself enough to die rather than allow them  to inject  and “treat” you, when you know damn well you don’t need their cures and everything inside you screams “don’t trust, run! Run!”?

What would YOU sacrifice for freedom? What are YOU prepared to give up on to keep your fire burning, your inner child happy, yourself – godly human?

These questions popped into my head on a random afternoon while I was feeding bread to some pigeons in the park. People rushing around me, double decker windows reflecting the sun, flickering, lighting up the whole street for a moment, like sparks of a brief, collective awakening, here and there masks were being worn and me, realizing I would rather die before I let them come anywhere near the little girl I carry with me. Realizing that she is all I have – the little girl who spends most of the time in my chest, playing, dancing to the beat of her own drum, having faith in humanity, fighting against Evil on a daily basis, attaching herself to those who need love, more than anything, always teaching me something – and I would rather die than let them have her.

This time I know better, this time I’m wiser. I won’t let her out of my sight. They won’t value her, they won’t take the time to understand that her price is way beyond whatever they have to offer and what she brings to the table is much more than they deserve. They won’t be gentle with her. They’ll mould her into something she will grow to despise, they’ll do the best they can to make her believe she is just like everyone else and that she needs them more than they need her. Bullshit. They’ll try to control her, they’ll monitor her every move, they’ll imprison her spirit and brainwash her into powerlessness again. But not as long as I’m here, guarding her and everything she stands for. Not as long as I have a beating heart that begs “save her at all cost”!

I listen as she talks about her dreams and the madder they seem, the more I think she’ll make them happen. I watch her as she believes, as her eyes shine, as the world around her becomes better, brighter, as she brings hope everywhere she goes, as she revives hearts that couldn’t beat before, as she believes she can move mountains. And when she tells me she can move mountains, I believe her. Even if only to find out her mountains are nothing else than drawings on a piece of paper. She is everything and nothing like you’d imagine. She will make great things happen. She’s a paradox. She’s perfect just the way she is. She is the place I come from, the closest thing to home I have. She’s been with me for as long as I can remember. She is my connection to Source. She inspires me to do the best I can. She is the truth itself. She gives everyone chance after chance, she is so young and yet so patient, so wise, she lets me watch as she makes a difference here and a difference there, as she transmutes energies, as she heals, as she speaks to God. She makes people laugh. She makes people feel. She moves people to their core, but most won’t understand her right away. And when they finally do, she’s already gone. She makes people wonder “Is she real? Do creatures like that even exist?” Together we discovered new forms of love, ways of loving they didn’t even know about on Earth, until she came here. She brings kindness, the innocence of a thousand souls. She opens up portals to new dimensions for me. She showed me life through her eyes and since then, miracles started to happen. She is freedom, she is a poem, she is a force of nature, she is all mine. Through her, am learning about motherhood. She is safe here. She’s turned me into a gentle-hearted lioness, I’d slay all this world’s demons for her, bathe in their blood as a celebration ritual and then watch her play with her pigeon, swearing I’ve never seen something more beautiful. Because of her, I am ascending to higher frequencies. She keeps me curious about the great things in life. She keeps me young. She keeps me unapologetically mine.

And oh, how they can sense her power, even in the distance! How alluring their voice, how soft their words, how wide their smiles…, how they wave their tales and show their teeth in crooked smiles, how they’d want her back, oh, they know how important this little girl is but she can see straight through their act. She knows what’s real and what’s not and then warns me about it. At the end, she applauds them for the effort, says “so long, farewell, auf wiedersehen, good-bye” and rises two fingers to her temple, in a salute, turns around and forgives all – and then, she patiently waits for the whole world to come to it’s’ senses. “And it will”, she tells me and there is something about this girl that makes me believe her. There’s something about this girl that makes me believe in humanity all over again.

Green Eyed Kisses,